This week I was sitting on the phone with tech support, and over and over again, I thought of things I could have done while I sat there -- waiting -- not living my life. Are you "on hold" in your life? Are you waiting for a spouse to come along, or for him/her to act better towards you? Are you waiting on the motivation to get your home organized? Are you waiting on a great job to fall into your lap?
Stop waiting on your life! Summer is a great time for you to take on some healthy mental attitudes and projects. Are you ready to stop waiting and work on who you are, and what kind of life you really want to live? Here are some ideas.
1. Control-ability. Get clear on what you can really control and what is out of your control. You can't control world politics, but you can vote. You can't control terrorism, but you can be prepared in your own home. You can't control the construction crews on the freeway, but you can control how much time you allot for a trip. Knowing what you can control and exercising that, and letting go of what you can't, reduces stress related feelings immensely.
2. Focus on the who, not the what. If you find that you've been stuck in a goal for a while, try restating it in "who am I" terms instead of "what I want" terms. For example, instead of saying "I want to lose 10 lbs.", say "I want to be someone who can hike with the kids on the weekend without getting winded." Be sure to be specific with this. Notice that "I want to be someone who helps others" could mean anything from a clerk in the grocery store to a heart surgeon. Focus on who you want to be. Then ask yourself what actions would be fit with your desire "to be" instead of "get".
3. Be Generous. You know you haven't worn that shirt in 2 years. Someone needs that shirt to keep warm on the streets this winter, don't let it just sit idle in your closet. Live from abundance, not lack. You'll have other shirts. Share. Feel good about yourself for helping others less fortunate.
4. Give it a home. The biggest culprit for chronically lost items in the home or office (keys, remote, phone, scissors, batteries) is that they don't have a home. Just like teenagers, if you know where they are going to be, you don't have to waste time looking for them!
5. Establish routines. While they sound boring and confining, routines are actually freeing. Instead of being worried and anxious on Monday morning wondering if your credit-card bill is late again, you'll feel calm knowing that you always pay bills on Wed. evening, so you have nothing to be concerned about. Routines take the stress out!
6. Analyze it. Did you know that a full 80% of your problems come from 20% of your life? It's true! Determine what that 20% is that's affecting so much of your life, and start working to make it more efficient and orderly.
7 Assign Value. A big mistake I see in my coaching clients is not assigning a true value to your time, to your energy, to your money, and to the "real estate" (space) of your home or office. Realize that for each thing you say Yes to -- from a pair of shoes to watching a movie -- you have said No to something else. Always ask yourself - is this *valuable* enough to me to bump something else from my closet, my schedule, my money?
